Dearest Joan. Thank you for your response. I am pleased to hear that you enjoy my blog (newsletter). My most recent blog incarnation is titled “Oh No I’m a Caregiver – Dementia – Our Cautionary Story.” These posts are of extra-special significance to me. Dementia appears to be a reality destined to assault all of our lives in one way or another eventually. I believe that the story I have to tell – through this first post – and others yet to come at – has valuable insights to offer. For this reason, I hope you will pass it on to others in the hope that they might benefit from what I am learning.

For example – my husband Jonathan is actually quite fine at this early stage. He is engaged in lots of cognitively powerful activities. He writes original memoir pieces that are very good and says this is the result of sitting in on so many of my writing workshops over the past forty-five years. He now finds more joy in writing than the drawing and music that were his usual creative pursuits in the past. This is good because, as you know, portraying characters and composing scenes require a deep level of focus and detail concentration which is very beneficial for him. He also loves jigsaw puzzling – the 1500-piece variety. Again much concentration is required plus he has fond memory associations of doing puzzles with his mom when he was a boy. He also reads a lot – challenging books as well as his favorite New York Times articles. He has also begun gardening at our church which has a large planted space in sore need of attention. Medically he is taking a basic drug that has disappeared his brain fog.

Dementia is not like the tv commercials portray it to be. Their purpose is to ramp up fear and sell very expensive, very dangerous drugs. There is a long and gradual period before extreme changes begin and the aggressiveness these ads emphasize can often be mitigated with simple mood medications that are harmless and affordable.

Meanwhile there is a real-life story to be told here of real-life experience. I hope you will continue to read and share it. Dementia is a reality for many of us. Truth is our best armor against being cast into despair by the prospect. I hope to add a little to that reassuring truth. Dementia is one of the many ways all of us will evolve from this life into whatever may lay beyond. Passing on is our universal destiny. Some of those passages involve discomfort and unpleasantness. We can perhaps be a bit better prepared if we understand realistically what to expect.

That is what our story – Jonathan’s and mine – is meant to do. Help others – in an honest and caring fashion – to be prepared. Love and Blessings. Alice